You Can Sleep When You're Dead
by lovely-whisper
Summary: NEW summary: Will you settle for friendship even though you can have love? Previous one shot. Will be MerMark. Rated for language and future events.
1. Chapter 1

**You can sleep when you're dead**  
By lovelywhisper

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**Summary**: The life of an intern is exhausting, but most of all complicated. A short one shot, but might become a multi chapter story. Will be MerMark. Please R & R.

**Disclaimer**:Don't own anything that is even slightly familiar to Grey's.

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You can sleep when you're dead. Never before has a single sentence been so true. And for those of you who don't know yet, it's the perfect sentence to describe the live of an intern, attending, resident, chief of staff or whatsoever. I think it's even one of the most used sentences in the hospital. Or at least at Seattle Grace. They don't always say it, but they sure as hell think it. They mutter it when they see you yawn, some of them think it when you say that you're tired and some of them just say it right to your face. Just so you know where you stand.

Right now I have no idea where I stand. All I know is that I'm the intern. The one who has to listen to everyone, sometimes even to the nurses. Or at least you pretend to listen to them, just so they won't page you for every rectal exam they have to perform. Because let's face it, there's not a living soul on this planet that would volunteer to do rectals. That is the only thing in my line of work that I wouldn't miss.

Something I would miss in my line of work are the great and interesting surgeries. Definitely if you have a great shot on being the intern who gets to scrub in. The one who will have the pleasure to assist on open heart surgery, a craniotomy, a complex c-section and, if you're really lucky, a humpty dumpty surgery. That is, if your name stays on the board instead of being magically erased.

Something I would love to erase is my lovelife. I have been torn apart by both Derek and Finn for I don't know how long. Torn between McVet and McDreamy. And just when I thought it couldn't become more complicated, it did. Courtesy of dr. Mark Sloan. He just had to suggest that I should move one, start over fresh, maybe even with him. Why the hell did he do that? Doesn't he know that my life is already complicated enough without McSteamy making googly eyes at me? Probably not. But I toldhim that I couldn't possibly start something with him. I am forever grateful to the person that paged him right that second, he or she saved me from his reply. Mark somewhat ordered me to get him another beer before walking off to call the hospital, so I did.

I walked over to the bar, ordered a beer from Joe and was about to walk back to the table when Derek stepped in front of me, introducing himself to me like I had never met him before. I can't help but roll my eyes as he explains himself. When he tells me that he wants to start over, start fresh, I can't help but look past him. I see Mark standing there and he obviously heart every word.

I look into his eyes deeply, desperately searching for an answer, but all I get is a blank stare. When I turn my attention back to Derek, I can see Mark heading to the table, grabbing his coat, before walking out the door.

I look at Derek, who, for the first time, actually seems sincere about his feelings. 2 hours ago I might have jumped him right there and then, thanking him for finally coming to his senses. Instead I look at him and tell him it's too late. That I can't be with him, not right now anyway. I need time to think, time to make my own decision. That I think he should enjoy being alone for a while. I know I've always enjoyed being alone. I don't tell him I'm sorry, I just hug him goodbye, before heading to the table to get my coat. Before I walk out of the door, I turn around one last time and the last thing I see is the defeated look in his eyes.

When I reach my car I feel a calm feeling wash over me. I feel like tonight, I have started a new part of my life. The part where I'm not depending on Derek anymore to make me feel good. For the first time in a very long while I feel completely happy. Courtesy of dr. Mark Sloan.

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**Author's note:**Hope you all liked it, I know that I enjoyed writing it. Right now I'm already comtemplating ideas for a second chapter, as I really want to write a chapter full of Mark and Meredith hapiness. Please feel free to read and review! 


	2. Chapter 2

**You can sleep when you're dead**  
by lovely-whisper

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**Disclaimer**: Don't own GA or anything related to GA. It's all purely for fun.

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**_Chapter 2 Mark's POV_**

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I am so stupid. Those four words have been haunting me ever since I left Joe's. I am so incredibly stupid. Right now, there is no doubt in my mind that my 400 bucks an hour shrink is right. Why on earth did I do it? I just had to tell her that she should move on. Start over fresh. And I just had to add that she could move on with me. I had made it sound like it was a joke and that's what I thought it was. A joke. Like pretty much everything I am is a joke. But for some reason I feel angry, even jealous maybe. But most of all I just feel incredibly confused.

I step out of the elevator and head towards my office with such high speed that no nurse will be able to ask me anything. I slam the door hard, feeling some sort of release, and I hope that it will be a message to the world. It would be best not to disturb Dr Sloan right now, because he will have your head.

For a while I just pace around my office, thoughts racing through my mind, tiring me out. I sit down in one of the chairs heavily and rest my head in my hands. I try to think of other things, happy things. Anything to make me stop thinking about earlier this evening.

For a while I thought that Meredith and I were having a good time. We were talking, we were laughing and most of all, we both weren't thinking about Derek. We were just having a good time together. And then I just had to be paged. I tell Meredith I have to answer this and make my way to the pay phone in the back of Joe's , but not before telling her to get me another beer.

When I get back I freeze on the spot. I see Derek talking to Meredith. I'm unable to hear what he says and even though a small voice in my mind tells me to butt out, I decide to walk a little closer, simply because my curiousity wins. Just when I am close enough to hear the conversation I hear Derek tell Meredith that he would like to start over. Right that moment Meredith looks behind Derek and stares at me with a slightly helpless look in her eyes. I decide to help her out and turn around, heading back to the table to grab my coat and walk out of the door. Never looking back, simply because I don't want to see the reunion.

Instead of going back to the hotel, I decide to head back to my office. I was stupid enough to think that if I would head back to the hospital there would be something there that would get my mind of the events of this evening. But I couldn't have been more wrong. Every single thing in Seattle Grace reminds me of Meredith. Wether I want to or not.

Just then I hear a soft knock on my door. I decide to ignore it, hoping that who-ever is knocking will go away. But luck isn't on my side this day.

The door slowly opens and reveals Meredith, her eyes focused on the floor, her hands fumbling with the buttons on her shirt. Even though she isn't smiling or glowing, she still looks incredibly hot to me.

She takes a few steps into my office and softly closes the door behind her. I can see her building up courage and I already dread the things she is going to say.

She slowly looks up and meets my eyes. There is no trace of hapiness in her eyes when she says the dreadfull words.

"We have to talk".

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**TBC!**

**AN:**Sorry that I haven't updated in quite a while. I lost my muse for a while, but now he or she seems back. I have so many ideas for this story, it's killing me that I can't write constantly.

Maybe Mark seems a little out of character, but this is how I picture him being sensitive and all. Because there was no-one around, he didn't have to play though guy.

Please use the review button! It's highly appreciated.


	3. Chapter 3

**You can sleep when you're dead**

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**Disclaimer: **the same as in the previous two chapters. Don't own a thing.

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_Chapter 3 Meredith's pov_

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I am mentally kicking myself for making this mistake. Why on earth did I go to Mark? I was having a wonderful time, alone in my car. I felt light and clear, instead of all dark and twisty. I should have just gone home. But instead I now find myself in the office of my fellow dirty mistress. And he's looking at me. Expectantly. Like 'she's about the say something' expectantly.

Damn, I hate it when he's right. I was about to say something. Because I started with the famous words 'we need to talk'. You don't say that when you have nothing to say. A few moments ago I knew exactly what I was going to say, but now I'm not so sure. Definitely not, because Mark is looking at me expectantly. So I have to say something, because that's what he's expecting.

I see him rolling his eyes. Busted! I hope he doesn't know that I'm rambling in my head. I hate it when I do that. Maybe I should just open my mouth and start talking. But I might ramble again.

"So, you talked to Derek?", Mark says, maybe slightly annoyed that I didn't bring it up minutes earlier.

Thank you! I feel relieved that Mark started the conversation. But maybe I should reply something, because he's already looking at me again. Damn him.

"Yeah, I did".

That was a very easy reply. I still fumble with the buttons of my shirt and I'm getting slightly worried that I might rip them of. And me, naked in Dr Sloan's office, doesn't seem like a very good idea. Then again, pretty much everything I've done lately hasn't been great ideas.

"So I guess congratulations are in order?", he asks, his voice thick and rough and not joyful at all.

I look at him and stare in his eyes. Did he just say congratulations? Why would he... ah, right. He figured we were back together now. Seriously, I have to stop rambling like this. Because now Mark is starting to look like he's about to admit me to the Psych Ward.

"Congratulations?", I almost choke out. "No, they are not in order".

The look on his face shows some signs of relieve.

"What happened?", he replies, meanwhile pointing to the chair in front of him.

I slowly walk towards the chair and sit down. I take a deep breath before looking at him.

"Well, if you would have eavesdropped a little longer, you would have heard me tell him that he should be alone for a while. That I needed some space and some time to figure things out.", I say.

"I didn't eaves..", Mark starts to say, but one stern look of me and he cuts off his words.

"Okay, maybe I did. Just curious you know", he continues.

I look at him and feel my lips twist into a small smile. I hate it when I can't control those things.

"But why did you walk away from him? You love him right?", he pushes.

"I do, or at least I think I do. But it's a complicated and long story", I come up with, hoping he will let it rest. But of course he doesn't.

"Then uncomplicate it", he says. "Besides, I have all the time in the world".

"Fine. Have it your way. I'll tell you. But do you at least have something to drink. Because I was actually looking foward to that second drink at Joe's, but you left kinda early".

He smirks at me and stands up, making his way to his desk. My eyes follow his movements. When he bends forward to open the lowest drawer, my eyes land on his ass. He has a nice ass. Nice ass? What am I doing? I can't be looking at his ass. Seriously! For a second I feel like my eyes are glued to his ass, but then I'm able to look at something else. I focus on the chair in front of me.

He hands me a glass filled with a liquor I can't smell. I take a small sip, secretely thanking him for stashing wodka in his desk.

"So, start talking", he urges, sounding like a shrink.

I take a few deep breaths and start talking.

"Have you ever settled for friendship? Even though you could have love?", I say.

"What do you mean?", he asks me. Well, that's really shrink like.

"Well, sometimes I wonder that maybe Derek and I aren't supposed to love each other. That maybe we are not supposed to be together. And that maybe we don't love each other, but that we just think that we do. Because neither of us has been alone for a longer period of time." I pause.

When I look at him he looks like he understands and I think he can understand perfectly, because maybe he feels the same way about Addison.

Without using words, instead just using his eyes, he urges me to continue.

"We have been dancing around each other for such a long time. I think neither of us knew what we wanted. But it's weird, you know. Because I can't help wondering if he would hurt me again. Because I have been hurt enough"

"First he leads me on for weeks, making me fall in love with him so fast. And he never ever tells me that he's married. So all the secret phonecalls I ignore. Because I love him. And love really makes you blind. So weeks later I meet the woman that he's been married to for the last 11 years. He made me the dirty mistress that I still am today." I pause again as I feel a lump in my throat.

I take a long sip from my drink and I look at him. He expression is softened and he leans back in his seat, relaxed. He smiles at me lightly and urges me once again to continue.

"Then, when he finds out that I'm moving on, he calls me a whore and he breaks me down into a thousand little pieces yet again. Just when I was all glued back together. But even calling me a whore, didn't stop him from sleeping with me and therefore cheating on his wife on prom night."

"I have dealt with this for far too long a time. I am tired of worrying and I figured that maybe I should start listening to my friends when they tell me that he's no good for me. Maybe they're right, maybe I should move on. Completely. Without Derek that is".

I feel my cheeks burn after I finished talking. I feel a weird sense of closure. I stand up and turn around, because I feel like my eyes are going to betray me and release all the tears that I've built up.

I hear him stand up and start walking. For a second I think he's walking towards the windows, but seconds later I feel his arms around me and he pulls me in a hug. The back of my head rest on his shoulder as I relax instantly under his touch.

"Maybe we should. Maybe we should move on", he whispers in my ear, his breath tickling me and sending shivers down my spine.

I close my eyes and enjoy the moment. For a second I wish that he never lets go. I feel happy when he holds me. It's been a long time since I've been happy.

After a few minutes he slowly lets go of me. He slowly spins me around and stares into my eyes.

"Thank you", I hear him say and see him smiling at me.

He presses a soft kiss on my forehead and walks towards the door.

"Where are you going?" I dare to ask.

He looks over his shoulder and grins widely.

"I'm going to settle for friendship".

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**TBC!**

**A/N**: I know this has been a long chapter, but when I started writing this chapter, I simply couldn't stop and I didn't feel like making  
this a two part chapter. Besides, the first two chapters have been sort.

Please let me know what you think!


	4. Chapter 4

**You can sleep when you're dead  
**by lovely-whisper

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**AN:** This story takes place in season three. For the sake of the story, let's just pretend that the whole Addison/Mark pregnancy issues don't excist...

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**Previously on Grey's Anatomy:**

_After a few minutes he slowly lets go of me. He slowly spins me around and stares into my eyes. _

"_Thank you", I hear him say and see him smiling at me. _

_He presses a soft kiss on my forehead and walks towards the door. _

"_Where are you going?" I dare to ask._

_He looks over his shoulder and grins widely. _

"_I'm going to settle for friendship". _

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**Chapter 4 Mark's POV**

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'I'm going to settle for friendship'. Those six words have been racing through my mind ever since I said them to Meredith. Ok, so maybe that's not even 10 minutes ago but still, they have been racing through my mind non stop. I had sound so sure back there. Like deep down inside I knew it was the right thing to do. But when you are about to end a part of your life, a part of your life that made you very happy, you're just not so sure anymore. Then again, there had been a million signs which told me that my dearly wanted future with Addison pretty much never excisted to begin with. Ending it shouldn't be that hard. Besides, it's not like I'm going to hurt her, as she has told me pretty much a million times that I'm nothing more than a transcontinental booty call. Every single time she said that, it had hurt me to the core.

Of course I had pretended otherwise, seeing that at least I still have some sort of reputation to hold up.

So, when you think clearly and put one and one together, you are left with the conclusion that in this case it is better, and a lot healthier, if you just settle for friendship, he reasoned with himself. Besides, he was tired of competing with Derek, wether or not Derek was there to compete against. He was tired of being treathed like he was the bad guy by Derek and he was definitely tired of being treated like some sort of picolo. He was definitely going to settle for friendship.

When I arrive at the Maternity Ward, as that would be the place to find Addison, I stride through the Ward in a straight line, carefully avoiding everything that had anything to do with babies. There's no need for me to be intoxicated, if these babies are even able to intoxicate anyone. Personally, I don't have a problem with kids, as long as they aren't mine. Babies just aren't my thing. After walking through the main corridor of the Ward I end up in front of Addison's office.

For a few seconds I consider walking away like nothing had happened, but I know that's not the right thing to do. Somehow I feel like I have made a promise to Meredith and if there was one thing I will follow up on, it would be a promise.

So I just knock on the door. After a few moments I hear Addison tell him to come in. I take a deep breath and open the door. I walk into her office and close the door behind me, then casually leaning against it as I watch her.

"Hey", she said, looking up at him, before turning her attention back to the file in front of her.

"Hey", I replied. When I notice that she isn't focused on me, I decide to say some more. "We need to talk".

That got me her attention. She closed the file she was working on and looked at me.

"About what?", she asked casually.

I slowly make my way to her desk and sat down in one of the seats across from it.

"About us", I confirm her confused look.

She looks at me, a confused and dased look in her eyes. The eyes that I fell in love with.

"Why now?", she asks me, playing with the pen she was writing with.

So this is it. This is the time to be honest, to be completely honest about everything. For a second I feel like everyting moved to fast. That I´m not ready yet. But let´s face it, if I stay the same old Mark, I will never be ready. I just have to face this head on and make the best of it. That I can do.

"Because I'm tired Addi", I start.

"Tired of competing for your attention, tired of hurting Derek, tired of being me. Tired of hurting me. Let's face it, my obsession for you isn't healthy and it will probably never be. I've been hung up to a woman who I can't reach, who is way out of my leaque and who doesn't feel the way about me like I feel about her."

I pause for a second, because I need to take a deep breath. I have never been this honest about anything and it feels weird. I close my eyes for a second and when I open them again I see her looking at me. The confusion and daze have left her eyes, compassion and understanding have taken their place.

Before she is able to say anything, I continue.

"We can't keep doing this", I tell her. "No more trans-continental booty calls, no more calling me in the middle of the night and expect me to show up. Enough is enough. I can't keep living like this. I doesn't make me happy anymore Addi. I thought it did, but I realize now that I can't have what I want, so I should just stop. I can't keep fighting for your love Addi. Not when you have told me over and over that you will never love me."

I can see her blinking away a few tears that try to spill. My words obviously have gotten through to her. She still fiddles with the pen as she looks up to me.

"Thank you", she says, her voice barely audible.

"Thank you for being so honest. I have made such a mess of everything".

I try to interrupt but she just helds up her hand as she continues.

"Even though I've been honest with you from day one, I still feel like I've used you. I have used you to ease my mind, to make me feel better. In the end I never really considered how you felt. I never thought of what it did to you. But now I do. And I know that I was wrong. Incredibly wrong by thinking that all of this didn't effect you. That you were just in for the easy sex.".

While she was talking I could see her face change. Her twisted expression slowly disseapeared and the more she said the more she started to look relieved. Now, there were no more maybe's, no more twisted feelings. Now I knew I was doing to right thing.

"So all I want to say is that I'm sorry. I'm so incredibly sorry for everything I did. I just really hope that we could be friends. That one day the three of us can be friends again.", she finishes.

When we look at each other, we smile a little. Knowing that everything is ok now, we both stand up and I watch her moving around her desk to step in front of me. She wraps her arms around me and gives me a hug. For a few seconds I hug her back before slowly taking a step back to look at her.

"I'd really like that. Being friends that is. And maybe, someday, I can be friends with Derek again. But I'm going to let him set the pace. Maybe if he sees that we can be friends, he and I can be friends again too", I explain to Addison, feeling incredibly relieved and for a second I wonder if my current state of euforia can be marked as light and bubbly. God, I hope not. Because that would definitely be the end of my world renowned reputation.

We both smile as she extends her hand waiting for me to shake it. I extend my hand too and our hands meet in mid-air.

"Friends!", we say, both at the same time.

"So, no more hard feelings?", she asks me.

I shake my head.

"No, no more hard feelings. You?", I return the question?

"Not at all", she smiles at me and that's my cue to leave.

"Well, I have a surgery in half a hour, so I really should go. I quess I'll see you around", I say.

"I'm sure we will", Addison replies, smiling softly.

When I leave her office and close the door behind me, I can't help smiling. I've never felt this content, never felt this happy. Settling for friendship might not be such a bad thing after all.

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**TBC!**

**Next chapter**: Meredith faces Derek and decides that she wants to settle for friendship too. But will Derek react the way Addison has? Stay tuned!


	5. Chapter 5

**You can sleep when you're dead**  
**Chapter 5  
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**Disclaimer**: same as the previous 4 chapters. Don't own a thing.

**A/N: **Sorry for the delay in updates, I have been kind of stuck with this story. I have never deleted so many words and lines as in this chapter. But now I think that I actually did it. I wrote this chapter. Hopefully the next few chapters (yes, there are gonna be a few more chapters) will be easier to write.

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**Previously on Grey's Anatomy:**

Mark talks to Addison and they decide to settle for friendship. Because sometimes it's better to settle for friendship if you can't have love.

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'_Hey Grey, just so you know. I have just talked to Addison and we have settled for friendship. And know I feel kind of relieved. It feels good knowing that Addison and I are friends now. So I guess you're up next? Well good luck I say to you, cause you're gonna need it. Talk to you soon'.  
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_'Damn it'. I silently curse Mark after hearing the message he left at my voicemail. He did it. He had actually talked to Addison and they had settled for friendship. And now he was wishing me luck. Cause I'm gonna need it. He really knows how to put the pressure on someone. And I hate to admit it, but he is actually right. I am next. I have to talk to Derek and try and settle for friendship. Not like that's going to be easy, but after a whole lot of consideration, like nights and nights of no sleep and a whole lot of consideration, I came to the conclusion that friendship might be the best thing for us.

So I try to gain all of my strength and take off in my search for Derek. I have to talk to him today, because delaying this matter will most definitely cause a whole lot of trouble.

After checking the board I learn that Derek has no surgery for rest of the day, which would probably give me enough time to talk to him. I am relieved that he doesn't have any surgeries, because I figure that my little speech will hurt him. And if he's hurt, he won't be able to operate. Okay, I'm rambling again. I have to stop doing that.

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After wondering the hospital for about fifteen minutes I finally track him down in one of the locker rooms. His face lits up when he sees me standing in the doorway and I instantly feel guilty as hell. For a few seconds I feel like I can't breath and I hope to God that he doesn't notice.

"Hey Mer", he says, smiling his biggest McDreamy smile.

He walks closer to me and kisses my cheek. When his lips almost touch mine I turn my head slightly so his lips caress my cheek once again.

"Hi Derek", I reply softly.

"What's wrong?", he asks me, his voice full of concern, obviously because I wouldn't let him kiss me. Obviously something has to be wrong when I don't want him to kiss me.

I wonder for a second what answer to give. Should I be honest and tell him everything I have to say or should I just say that everything's fine? Seriously, sometimes I really can't stand to be around myself. Not even an hour ago I was so certain that settling for friendship was the best thing to do and now I was so confused. Shaking my head in a small attempt to organize my thoughts, I realize that I indeed just have to tell him. I just have to get it over with, because I know me and I know that if I don't tell him know, I will probably never tell him.

I take a deep breath and decide that I can better start talking.

"We... We have to talk", I tell him, slightly impressed with myself that I was able to form an entire sentence.

I can feel his mood changing and his face falls just a little, before he lifts his head up to look me in the eye.

"About what, Meredith?", he replies, using my full first name, instead of calling me Mer. Maybe he's afraid that if he _Mer's_ me I will start yelling.

Damn it. Time has come. Way too soon. But still, it has come. I take a few more deep breaths, before I look at him and start talking.

"About us, Derek. We need to talk about us", I begin.

His face clears up slightly when I bring up the us thing. Little does he know that I'm about to break his heart. Even though it hurts to the core, I decide to go through with it, because eventually it will be for the best.

"You had all the time you needed and you're willing to start over fresh?", he asks me hopefully.

"Not exactly", I say, sounding way too unsure.

"Then what it is Mer. Just say it, it would make you feel better", he urges me.

No, it wouldn't make me feel better. Not at all. Having this conversation over and done with, that would make me feel better. But I can't tell him that. I need to tell him the truth. Because he deserves the truth.

And then I realize that I just have to start rambling. Really rambling, like a Meredith kind of rambling. Because that's what I do best. So I decide to give it a try.

"I can't do this anymore Derek. I can't let you hanging like this. I can't have you waiting for me, while there's a chance that you will be waiting an eternity. I can't let you put your life on hold for a girl like me Derek. It's just not fair."

"Can't I decide wether or not it's fair?", he askes me, his voice sounding slightly worried.

"No!", I exclaim. "You can't decide that, because right now you are willing to wait a lifetime. And you shouldn't Derek, you really shouldn't.".

I feel like I have just witnessed a dejá vu. Because I have used those words before. When I told Finn that he really shouldn't come back to visit me, when I broke up with him. And now I am about to break up with Derek.

I see his face fall as reality hits him. My words have hit him like a ton of bricks and I can see the look in his eyes change when he realizes what I am trying to say.

"You're... You're breaking up with me?", he askes me, his voice sounding cold now, though a little quivering. He looks at me and I know that I have to say it. He needs confirmation.

"Yes, I am", I tell him, my voice soft and weak. I am at the urge of crying and breaking down.

His entire appearance changes in front of me. His eyes turn stone cold and his body tenses up, his fists clenching and unclenching.

"This has anything to do with Mark?" he spits out and his words shock me. How the hell does he know that?. I try to keep the shock out of my eyes and my voice when I answer him.

"Why would this have anything with Mark?", I ask him, sounding a little angry that he would bring this up. I hope that my anger will mask the shock.

"I heard some gossip", he replies coldly.

"Gossip? Since when do you listen to gossip?", I tell him.

"They saw you talking and laughing", he sneers.

"Wow. Then it must be true huh? Because I'm talking and laughing with Dr Sloan, I'm probably screwing him too huh!", I exclaim angry, not caring wether or not my words affect him.

He looks shocked by my outburst.

"Well, it must be true then, otherwise you wouldn't have reacted this way", he tells me. The look in his eyes now one of pure disgust.

"For the record Derek. This has nothing to do with Mark. This has to do with us. This is for the best Derek. We're not supposed to be together. Not after everything we have been true. I am tired of competing Derek. Tired of living up to your idea of the perfect woman. Because let's face it. I ain't perfect. You obviously never loved me enough, I obviously never was the one for you. You didn't pick me Derek. When you had the chance, you didn't pick me. And I respect you so much for that. You really are a good guy Derek, but it's just not going to work for us."

There, I said it. I have been perfectly straight with him and now all I want to do is crawl into the corner and just cry. Because honestly, he really looks broken now. I broke him into a million little pieces and I'm not sure if he can mend himself back together.

When I look him in the eye, I can see a whole lot of emotions running through his eyes. I even think I can see a little hatred. I wouldn't blame him if he would. Hate me that is. I gave him a perfect reason to hate me.

He starts walking towards the door and when his hand reaches the doorknob, he stops momentarily.

"I never want to see you again", he tells me, his back still turned, his voice cold and angry, before he walks out of the locker room and slams the door.

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TBC!

There, I did it. I wrote a whole chapter. Finally! Hope you guys liked it! If there are any mistakes, spelling errors, please don't abandon me. I don't have a beta-reader and English isn't my first language. But hey, I think I did pretty good (good god, I'm almost as cocky as McSteamy...)

Please read and review, it's highly appreciated!


	6. Chapter 6

**You can sleep when you're dead**  
**Chapter 6

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**

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything. Wish I did though...

* * *

_Meredith's POV_

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After Derek leaves the slamming of the door echoes in my head. I thought that telling him that we were finally and completely over would give me some sort of closure, some sort of peace. Instead I feel awful, heartbroken, but most of all so incredibly quilty. I know I shouldn't feel this way. I know that what I did was for the best.

Because let's face it, we have no future. We were doomed from the start. We were doomed the moment he lied to me, the moment he seduced me without telling me he was married. But hey, I've been weak too. I tried to forget about him, tried to erase him from my mind. But no such luck. No matter how hard I tried, there was something that always drew me back to him. Like I was some sort of a puppet on a string. Because let's face it, he did pull all my strings. But that's over now. I think I finally managed to make him hate me. And hey, he has every right to hate me. Okay, I am totally rambling now, that really has to stop.

I sit down at one of the benches and look in the mirror across of me. The person staring back at me scares me. She looks tired, has dark circles under her eyes and her hair looks like it needs a conditioner. When I think of the conditioner, flares of memories enter my mind. Derek used to love my conditioner. My sweet, lavender smell conditioner. I make a mental note to dispose it and find a completely different smelling one. Seriously, I really think I need to dispose everything that would somewhat remind me of Derek, because other wise I'm not so sure that I will pull through.

When I contemplate the thought of pulling through, a sense of peace washes over me and suddenly I realise that I will be able to pull through. Because I have Mark. And he better be there for me. For a second I believe that if Mark never settled for friendship with Addison, I probably never would have told Derek. Even in a serious matter like this, he's still able to challenge me. I could always just blame it on Mark. That would be the easy thing to do. Blame it all on Mark, explain to Derek and maybe he would understand and take me back. And then what? Happily ever after?

Maybe we'll be happy for a few months, maybe even a few years. But I don't want to be just happy. Or maybe I have just forgotten what it's like to be happy.

I hate the fact that I'm feeling so insecure. I should be jumping in joy now. Or maybe not, because that would have been inappropriate. Maybe I should just get up and walk away from this locker room. If I only had a place to go. Okay, now I'm really drowning in self pity. Of course I have places to go. I could go home and see my friends. They would be able to lighten my spirits. Or maybe I could go and see if Mark was at the hotel. Or maybe, I should go to Joe's, cause let's face it, Joe's has all the answers. Well, he has tequila and right now that sounds good to me.

So I stand up, brush off my clothes and take another look in the mirror. I adjust my hair and put it up in a pony tail. I take a deep breath and tell myself that this is the start of my new life. The start of a new and improved Meredith. But that new life will start tomorrow. Right now I need some tequila.

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4 minutes later, a new world record, I arrive at Joe's and sit down at the bar.

"Hi honey, what can I get you?", Joe askes me, sending me one of his famous smiles.

I roll my eyes. Seriously? The guy still has to ask me what to get me?

"Tequila, please. And keep 'em coming", I tell him, trying to smile back at him but failing miserably.

"Rough night?", he asks me when he puts the shot in front of me, the bottle of tequila next to it.

I drink the shot in one swift motion and slam the glass on the bar.

"You could say that", I answer him.

Without waiting for me to point at the glass, he fills it back up.

"McDreamy?"

I look at him in surprise. Since when do barkeepers know how to read minds?

He senses my suprise and explains himself.

"He was here earlier. Ordering a large single malt scotch and mumbling to himself. Something about that he figured that divorcing his wife would make you go back to him. That he thought that everything was solved, but that somehow Mark has seemed to ruin another good thing".

"Really? He really said that?", I ask Joe.

"Yeah, he did. Just tell me one thing. Does Mark really have to do something with this? Is he really involved?"

I look at him and contemplate an answer. I'm pretty sure Joe is still on my side, so telling him the truth seems the best idea.

"Yeah, he does. But it's complicated. Something about settling for friendship while you can have love. He settled for friendship with Addison and I just did the same with Derek. Or at least I settled for friendship, I'm not sure Derek feels the same", I tell him.

Joe looks confused for just a second, before he starts smiling at me.

"That, my friend, is one of the better ideas I've heard in a while. If it means anything, I think you did the right thing. I'm happy for you.", he tells me, before filling up my glass once again.

"Thanks Joe, and for the record, it really means something. I think I really needed to hear that I did the right thing."

I take some money from my wallet and put it on the bar. I suddenly have the need to go and find Mark. I need to tell him that I pulled through. I owe him that much.

"Joe, I gotta go. See ya soon", I say, before slipping of the bar stool and turn to walk towards the door.

"See ya soon honey", he yells after me. "Tell Mark I said hi".

How the hell does he know that I'm going to see Mark? That's just freaky.

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15 minutes later I arrive at Mark's hotel. Because I feel like I'm in a hurry I decide to take the stairs. After a little while I arrive in front of Mark's hotel room.

I take a few deep breaths and try to catch my breath. Showing up here panting, would require a explanation and I am not going to tell him that I was dying to see him. Because that would just be fuel on the fire. He's cocky enough as it is, so no need to expend his ego a little more.

When I feel like I can breath normally I knock on the door. A few muffled sounds are heard, before I hear him walking towards the door.

After a few seconds it opens, revealing a tired Mark with a naked torso. Quickly I check my watch and discover that it's already past midnight. Mark obviously had already gone to bed. When I look back up he smirks at me. He obviously knows he looks good. Damn it, how can I focus when he's dressed like that.

I tear my eyes away from him and look him straight in his eyes.

"I settled for friendship with Derek".

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**TBC!**

Yeah, I finally finished another chapter. My other GA story is currently under advisement and I am desperately searching for my muse. But I quess she is on a small break, due to the incredibly warm weather here in Holland. It's like 23 degrees Celsius here and it's still april. But hey, I'm not complaining. Just hope she returns very soon.

Please read and review and please tell me if maybe you have some ideas for future chapters. Cause I would be more than willing to use them.

Do you think it's too early for a little Mark/Meredith love?

See ya next chapter!


	7. Chapter 7

**You Can Sleep When You're Dead  
Chapter 7**

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Disclaimer: same as previous chapters. Don't own a thing.

* * *

Previously on You can sleep when you're dead:

_When I feel like I can breath normally I knock on the door. A few muffled sounds are heard, before I hear him walking towards the door._

_After a few seconds it opens, revealing a tired Mark with a naked torso. Quickly I check my watch and discover that it's already past midnight. Mark obviously had already gone to bed. When I look back up he smirks at me. He obviously knows he looks good. Damn it, how can I focus when he's dressed like that._

_I tear my eyes away from him and look him straight in his eyes._

"_I settled for friendship with Derek"._

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Mark's pov 

I'm surprised I've heard the knock on the door. I didn't expect anyone and most definitely not at this absurd hour. I have a surgery in a couple of hours and it's way past midnight. But I'm even more surprised that the knock on the door woke me up. Then again, it's not like I've been sleeping peacefully. I've been awake for most of the night, waiting for her. Waiting for Meredith. I know it sounds foolish and so totally not like me, but I can't help myself. I've been waiting for her ever since I've met her. The only reason I haven't made my move yet is because, contrary to popular believe, I'm not out to hurt my friend once again. Okay, call me stupid. I know that by making my move on Meredith will no doubtly hurt Derek, I also like to believe that Meredith might be truly interested in me.

And here she is, standing in front of me, fiddling with the hem of her shirt. And here I am, standing in front of her half naked. For a second I think that I should have worn a shirt, but when I see the trouble she goes through trying to tear her eyes away from me, I know that I'm save.

I feel the smirk on my lips and try very hard not too. It looks like she's about to say something serious and the last thing she'd need would be me, half naked and smirking.

I feel my heart speed up when she says that she settled for friendship with Derek. For a second I don't believe it, but when I see the hurt in her eyes I know it's true. She really did it. Because she looks hurt, I'm not sure if she's really sure about her decision. Honestly? If this was not about Derek, I would have kissed her already. I would have pulled her into my room and I would have started undressing her. But this is about Derek. This is about my former best friend. I realise that Meredith's settlement could be the very end of my friendship with Derek. Because, even though it's not true, he would believe that I've backstabbed him again.

Suddenly Meredith looks at me and I can almost see the question marks. Then I realise that several moments have past and we're still in the door way.

I chuckle. It seems like Meredith's rambling is slightly contagious. I step away from the doorway as she steps forward into my room. She slowly closes the door behind her.

"The neighbours don't have to witness what happens next", Meredith says with a playful voice.

"What is going to happen next?", I ask her as I try to make my voice sound as playful as her. I try very hard not to sound too needy, because right now I believe that I should let her decide the pace.

My question, however, is answered quickly when she closes the space between us and pushes her lips against mine. Softly at first, her hands gripping the sides of my face. I kiss her back gently and let my arms circle around her waist as I try very hard not to pull her too close to me. This is about her right now.

She pulls back gently and looks at me, a big smile on her lips.

"This feels good", she elaborates as she puts her forehead against mine.

"We should do it again then", I reply in my usual cocky voice, but I do not kiss her. Not yet. I need to know if she would kiss me again.

Between feather light kisses she tells me that we really should do it again. Seconds later she presses her lips on mine again, more forcefully this time. She teasingly traces the outlines of my lips with her tongue, before biting down my bottom lip gently, sucking it into her mouth. Her hands are wrapped up in my hair as she her tongue silently begs for entrance into my mouth.

I realise that this is what she wants right now, so I decide to give it to her. Because I've already been trying too damn long.

I pull her tightly to me, allowing her tongue to slip into my mouth for a few seconds, before I decide to slowly take over control. I back her against the wall, my hands cupping her ass, as I lift her up. She instantly wraps her legs around me and tries to pulls me closer. I pull my lips from her and slowly trace her jaw line with my tongue, placing hot kisses along the way. Her arms circle around my neck, trying to pull me closer.

I hold her close and slowly make my way towards the bed. But with every step I take it seems like reality kicks in more. There's a little voice in my head telling me that if I sleep with her now, I still haven't changed and I probably never will. It's also telling me that I need to be sure that it's me she wants and not just the rebound sex. For a few seconds I try to ignore the voice as I lower Meredith down on the bed gently. But the voice is right. I need to proof that I'm a changed man. Not just to Meredith, but mostly to myself. I need to know that I don't need sex to feel happy. So I reluctantly roll off her and lay down next to her. She groans unhappily as she pops herself on her elbows.

"Seriously!"

I look at her and for a second I wonder if there's a situation where that word can't be used.

"Seriously!", she exclaims again, harder this time, her brow quirked up, her face turned towards me, a confused look in her eyes.

"I can't do this. Not now. Not like this", I tell her, hoping it's a satisfying explanation.

But no, of course it's not.

"You can't do this? Why not? You can't tell me you forgot how to do it.", she tells me.

"Of course I know how to. It's just that it's a little inappropriate", I reason with her.

"You know what's inappropriate? This!", she gestures with her hand between us, "You stopping right in the middle. That's inappropriate".

I chuckle softly. I didn't think she would react like this.

"Look, if you were any other woman and Derek wouldn't be involved at all, I would have never stopped. But this involves you. It involves Derek. It involves a lot of bad history", I tell her.

She looks at me like I've grown two heads. That can't be good.

"So, if I understand correctly, this is about you wanting to prove to Derek that this is not just about sex? To prove to him that you can be in a serious relationship?", she asks me.

Okay, here it is. The moment of truth. I have to tell her the truth. It's not like she won't see right through me if I lie, so which other option do I have right?

"Yes". Now see, that wasn't so hard.

She studied in for a second before nodding her head.

"You're right. Besides, it would prove him something else. It would prove him that we both have changed.", she said as she started smiling.

"Why are you smiling?", he asked her, grateful that she understood.

"I'm looking forward to our first real date", she told him, pressing a soft teasing kiss on his lips.

"But now, we should sleep", she told him, "because you have an early surgery tomorrow".

"How do you know about my surgery?", he asked her.

"Because I'm the intern who'll be scrubbing in", she told him matter-of-factly.

He laughed out loud, pulling her down and craddled her in his arms. She adjusted herself so she was comfortable and closed her eyes.

After a few minutes Mark spoke up again.

"When will you tell me what happened between you and Derek", he asked, regretting saying it the seconds the words left his mouth.

He felt her smile lightly against his chess.

"Soon", she mumbled. "Now, sleep!".

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TBC!

Next chapter: Mark and Meredith talk about Derek.

Thanks for reading and please review, it's highly appreciated!


	8. Chapter 8

**You can sleep when you're dead  
Chapter 8

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**

**Disclaimer:** Don't own a thing. It's a pity. Really, it is. All the things I would do...

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Previously on You Can Sleep When You're Dead:

"When will you tell me what happened between you and Derek", he asked, regretting saying it the seconds the words left his mouth.

He felt her smile lightly against his chess.

"Soon", she mumbled. "Now, sleep!".

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_Derek's POV_

Her words still linger in my mind. The things she told me hurt me to the core. I can't believe she broke up with me. I always figured I would be the one breaking things up in the end. Because in the end, it's always been me who took all the first steps, it's always been me who said 'I love you' first. From the second I met her until the minute she broke up with me I have always believed that the only reason she was with me in the first place was because I was safe. She knew that I loved her and that was enough. Simply due to the fact that I have told her a million times that I was her knight in shining whatever and that I would always be there for her, because that's what guys do and the girls love it. But I guess that wasn't enough.

_I don't understand  
Your love is so cold  
It's always me who's reaching out for your hand  
I always dreamed  
That love would be effortless  
Like a petal falling to the ground  
A dreamer following his dream_

When I walk into the hospital all heads turn to me, like the news of the break up has already been spread around by the nurses. I wonder how they know though. A few nurses even try to flirt with me, thinking that I'm back on the market again. I walk straight past them, definitely not in the mood to deal with some love sick puppies. When I stop at the nurses station to pick up some files, I overhear Olivia talking to some other nurses. I can't hear everything they say, but what I do hear angers me to no extent. Apparently McSteamy and Meredith were seen while talking intimiately in a small, cosy restaurant down by the ferries. Already having heard enough, I turn on my heels and head straight to me office. I close the door way too hard, so I have no doubt that it would go unnoticed.

I'm shocked by the anger I feel building up inside of me. I have thrown my life away, eleven years of marriage down the drain and for what? For a dark and twisty fling. For somebody I thought I loved and for somebody I thought who loved me. Apparently not. I can't believe she went on a date already. Not even a day after she breaks up with me she's already falling back into her old pattern. Because let's face it, this thing between Mark and Meredith can't possibly be serious. It's just something that both of them do best. A one night stand.

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_Meredith's POV_

I wake up to the smells of pancakes and fresh coffee. When I look at my alarm clock I realise it didn't even went off yet and that I still have two hours that I can use for sleep. But I'm already feeling restless so I hop out of bed and change into sweats and a hoodie, before making my way downstairs to the wonderful smells.

"This smells like heaven", I comment while I make my way into the kitchen, taken back by all the food on the table. I can tell by the way, but most of all by the speed Izzie's baking that something's bothering her.

Izzie briefly looks up, before handing me a plate and pointing to the table.

"Eat".

I take the plate and contemplate what I'm going to take. I decide to take a little bit of waffles and the naturel pancakes that she apparently made for me. There are only 2 pancakes on the plate, while there's a full plate of blueberry pancakes right beside it.

When I look at Izzie I can see that her shoulders are tensed up. Scratch that, her entire body is tensed. Her hair is still perfectly in place, so my guess is that she hasn't had any sleep at all.

"Everything alright Iz?", I dare to ask.

She turns on her heels and glares at me. Okay, so maybe she's not alright. Forget I asked.

"I'm fine". Her reply is steady, though layered with anger, confusion and something that sounds like aggrevation.

I nod quickly because this doesn't seem like the time to talk to her about her issues. She is definitely not ready to talk.

After I finish breakfast I quickly get dressed and head back downstairs in a messy attempt to find my keys. Izzie exits the kitchen, my keys in hand and she offers them to me without a word.

I give her a quick hug and whisper to her that everything will be ok. For some reason I get the feeling that she needs to be told exactly that.

When I get in my car I suddenly smell Mark's cologne and memories of last night fill my mind.

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_Last night_

30 minutes and five dresses later, Meredith was finally happy with the way she looked. She didn't understand why she was making such a big deal about this and she definitely didn't understood why she felt like a giddy schoolgirl preparing for a first prom. But she dressed up anyway, putting on her make up and decided to leave her hair down.

After Mark picked her up, they had a silent trip to the restaurant, which turned around to be a Thai flavoured restaurant called Golden Garden. Apparently Mark's need for Thai food was as big as hers. She wondered if he had known about her secret addiction or that it was just a lucky guess.

While enjoying a wonderful meal of Lahb Gai (Spicy Chicken Salad) and Goong Gah Tiem (Garlic Shrimp), Mark and Meredith had started talking. First only about safe subjects, but not much longer the conversation was about Derek. Meredith told him about the moment when she broke up with him, the things she'd said, but most importantly the things she had felt. She was completely honest with him. He told her about his friendship with Derek and about the wish that someday maybe they would be okay again. In that moment that both felt like they knew each other for years already.

"Do you mind asking me why you broke up with Derek?", Mark asked carefully. "You have covered the who and where, but not yet the why", he explained.

Meredith smiled at his manors. He had been the perfect gentleman all evening and he was treating her like a princess. But secretely she wished that diner was over and that they were back in his hotelroom, finishing where he had stopped last time.

"Well", she started. "I think breaking up was one of those inevitable things. Maybe we would have made it through another few months, maybe even a few years. But I would always have this fear, maybe irriational fear, of him leaving me. It happened to Addison after eleven years of marriage. Who says it wouldn't happen to me".

Mark took her right hand in both of his hands and softly rubbed it, like he gently urged her to continue.

"I realised that maybe I've idolized my relationship with him. I have kept him waiting for so long. I've been stringing him along in my web of problems and that wasn't fair. He doesn't deserve to be waiting forever. He deserves someone that loves him unconditionately and isn't so incredibly dark and twisty like me. He's been to hell and back for me and I'm incredibly sorry for that. He's just better off without me. And maybe, just maybe, I'm better of without him too", she ended her story, tears in her eyes, her right hand tightly holding on to Mark's hands.

"If you ask me", Mark started, his voice rough and low, "Derek is a damn fool for letting you walk. And just for the record, you are not incredibly dark and twisty."

Meredith snorted and rolled her eyes.

"Seriously!", he added, before clapping his left hand over his mouth.

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After paying the bill, Mark and Meredith drove home, again silently, but both with satisfying smiles on their faces. Meredith was a little confused when instead of driving back to the hotel, he drove straight to her house.

He stepped out of his car, making his way to the passenger side and politely helped Meredith out of the car and walked her to the door.

He placed a soft kiss on her cheek and thanked her for a wonderful evening.

"Seriously!", Meredith exclaimed loudly, obviously irritated. "You're not getting of that easily".

"Easily?", Mark asked innocently.

Meredith grasped his coat and pulled him towards her. She pressed her lips tightly against his and kissed him passionately. After a few seconds she let go of him.

"Thank you Mark. It's been wonderful", she said, her voice thick with passion. She almost dared him to walk away now.

"My pleasure", he answered her, his voice matching her passion perfectly. Still he managed to take a few steps back.

"I will see you tomorrow", he added, before almost quickly making his way back to his car.

Meredith stood in the door until he had driven of before stepping inside.

For once she felt genuinly happy. She could only hope it would last.

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**TBC!**

Okay, that's it for now. It's a long chapter, I almost couldn't stop writing. Hopefully it's been the update everyone was waiting for.

I'm thinking about wrapping up this fic in two more chapters. And then maybe start a sequel. Or at least I will be able to concentrate on my other fics. Maybe I should make a deal with myself not to start another fic unless the other fics are either complete or updated.

One more thing: please review! It's brings a little sunshine in my incredibly rainy days (that's literally, because the wether in Holland is very, very, very wet... and it's supposed to be summer...)

Oh yeah, the italic lines in Derek's POV are from the song Where's Your Heart by Kelly Clarkson. Obviously, I don't own that song.


	9. Author's Note

Dear readers,

First of all I would like to apologize for the lack of updates on any of my stories. I don't really have an explanation, all I can say is that Life happened. I feel bad, because I love to write and I love the feeling I get when somebody reviews. But for some reason I have stopped writing completely, due to either lack of muse and/or lack of enthusiasm.

But, after this afternoon I will have a three week vacation, which means more than enough time to start writing and updating again. For the first two weeks I won't have a computer, so I won't be able to update. But I promise that in the third week of my vacation, I will add a new chapter to all my incomplete stories.

So hopefully you haven't given up on me yet (wouldn't blame you if you have though).

Thanks for reading and reviewing, it means a lot!

Kirsten  
a.k.a. lovely-whisper


	10. Chapter 9

**You Can Sleep When You're Dead  
Chapter 9**

**

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**

**Disclaimer:**

You all know the drill. Nothing belongs to me.

**Author's note:**

Okay, so I'm back. Holiday was great, I really feel fully rested and ready to rock! And you know that the best part is? No? I wrote chapters for all my incomplete stories, including 2 chapters for this story! So am I the best or what? So without further ado, let's get to the story!

Little warning: this chapter didn't turn out the way I wanted to. I wanted a filler chapter but instead ended up writing about s.e.x. Just a little warning, maybe it can be a little graphic, so don't be offended at the end, you've been warned properly.

* * *

**Chapter 9**

A week had passed since Mark and Meredith's first date. 7 days filled with secret glances, quick stolen kisses, but they were mostly filled with work. The rumor mills once again were spinning on the highest speed, fed by the gossiping nurses who apparantly were deeply interested in the newest love triangle of Seattle Grace Hospital. And what is SGH without the possibility of betting on almost everything. So, no surprises there, the relationship of Mark and Meredith was a bet, people could make some serious money on.

To no surprise all bets were mostly started by the group of interns Meredith was a part of. They had placed bets on the duration of the relationship, some of the gamblers had bet on the fact that Dr Shepperd wouldn't stay single for a very long time and that he would find a love interest within the next two weeks and they also believed and therefore bet that Dr Montgomery would actually leave the hospital and to work in her friends' practice in Los Angeles, California. But that was a very easy bet and the one most likely to come true, seeing that Addison had no strings to Seattle anymore, definitely not now that her runner up was hooking up with the slutty intern of her ex husband.

GA

Meredith was on her way up to Mark's office after Alex had told her that Mark was looking for her and wished to see her in his office. After a soft knock on the door she entered his office and closed the door behind her.

She leisurely walked over to his desk, locking eyes with him. She felt his eyes burning her skin as he gazed longingly over her body. She felt her lips turn into a small smile, one of the things Mark had managed to do in the small amount of time they were together.

"I was told you wished to see me", Meredith said, her voice already thick with passion.

"Yes, I did wish to see you", Mark answered her, before pointing to the chair in front of his desk.

Meredith sat down and looked at him expectantly.

"We need to talk about our sexlives", Mark told her boldly.

Meredith cheeks turned red after hearing Mark's statement.

"Because apparantly we're doing 'it' at least three times a day", he continued.

Meredith's cheeks turned a darker shade of red.

"Where do we find the time?", Meredith mumbled softly to herself, not noticing the fact that Mark could hear her.

"What?", Mark said, obviously curious what she was talking about.

"Well…", Meredith started to explain, "…seeing that we're both surgeons with a very busy schedule, combined with the fact that we've only been together for a week and combined with the fact that one would think we would need our sleep too, three times a day sounds just a little … much".

Mark huffed. "Three times a day? That's a piece of cake for me", he told her with as much cockiness as he possible could.

Meredith's eyes grew wide in disbelief, before she looked genuinely confused. She wasn't really sure if he was telling the truth or that he was testing her.

"Seriously?", she asked him, not knowing what to see exactly.

Mark nodded fiercely, his McSteamy smirk plastered on his face.

Meredith just shook her head, dismissing the cockiness.

"Look at us", she told him, "we're talking about our not so existing sex life, just because some gossip loving nurses think that you have the libido of every single man in this world combined".

For a second Mark looked genuinely hurt before he started laughing loudly.

Mark stood up from his desk chair and walked around his desk towards Meredith, who was leaning back in her chair smiling softly at him.

GA

He put his hands on the armrests of Meredith's chair and leaned towards her, pressing a soft, longing kiss on her lips. She immediately responded by kissing him back fiercely, placing her hands on the back of his head, pulling him closer towards her. She started to move her kisses along his cheek towards his right ear. Biting down softly into his earlob she caused him to grunt softly. By the urge of his caresses, Meredith sensed that maybe today they had passed the point of no return. Right now, besides pretty imposible, it seemed completely inhuman to ask him to stop.

She pushed him back softly, causing him to open his eyes and lock eyes with her. Almost teasingly she stood up and walked around, making her way towards the office door. She closed the blinds and made sure the door was locked tightly. Within seconds Mark was standing behind her, pressing her up against the door, kissing the back of her exposed neck.

Meredith turned in Mark's embrace and kissed him fiercely, her tongue softly licking his lips before becking for entrance to his mouth. Without too much hesistation Mark allowed her entrance and was surprised to feel her unmistakeable passion and desire. She played teasingly with the buttons of his dress shirt. Her hands roamed his body gently, slowly making their way towards the button and fly of his darkwash jeans.

Mark's hands had found the strings of her scrubpants and slowly pushed the pants down her legs until they pooled around her feet. Meredith lifted her arms above her head to allow Mark to take off her shirt. For a moment Mark allowed himself to stare at her, taking in her beauty. Moments later he felt Meredith's hands urgently gripping the front of his shirt, indicating strongly that it had to come of. Obeying to her request Mark quickly removed the rest of his clothes, standing in front of her completely naked. He pulled her against him and swiftly unclasped her bra and pushed her panties down so they joined her pants on the floor. It was more than obviously that Mark's patience streak, which had the duration of a week, had come to an abrupt ending.

Once again Mark pushed her against one of the walls, swiftly lifting her up. He was surprised when Meredith immediately wrapped her legs around his waist. Holding her up with one arm, he used his other hand to open a drawer of the cabinet right next to them and removed a condom from it's surrounding plastic. He put it on and then looked at Meredith. He needed to be sure that this was what she wanted. Not that he would be able to stop now, but he just needed to know. Meredith's only response was a soft moan when she deliberately brushed her lower abdomen against his trobbing manhood.

Mark bit down into her shoulder softly when he gently entered her. He waited a few moments so Meredith could get adjusted before pushing himself further into her. He picked up a slow but steady rhythm.

Meredith lifted her hips and moved in perfect sync with Mark, meeting his trusts one by one. She surprised Mark when she whispered in his ear.

"Harder Mark, please".

Her voice sounded hoarse and was barely audible. Not being able to hold of any longer Mark trusts became more urgent as he trusted himself into her, more deeper and harder then before. He felt her tense up, her moans becoming more louder and he chuckled when she slid her hands between their bodies, trying to speed things up. Mark caught her hand and placed it above her head, before sliding his own hand between their moving bodies. He used his thumb to rub slow circles around her clit. Meredith's eyes were closed, her head gently banging the wall occasionly. When Meredith's moans grew even louder, he kissed her again, lowering the noise as much as he could, before picking up the pace once more.

After a few more trusts her body started trembling as he felt the muscles spasm around him. He trusted a few more times before he himself let go of the little selfcontrol he had left.

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**To be continued!**

Okay, so it didn't turn out the way I planned it. Not really a big surprise, if you know that I don't really have a plot for this story. I always just start writing and I'll just see where it leads me. Well, I obviously had a dirty mind writing this! LOL! But anyways, good news for you, because this probably means more chapters for this story!

Chapter 10 is already written, I'll just have to type it out. So it'll probably be up within the next few days. All my other stories will also be updated this week. So look forward to that as well.

Thanks for reading and sticking by me, please R&R, you will make my day.


	11. Chapter 10

**You can sleep when you're dead**  
**Chapter 10**

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**Disclaimer: **Do not own anything. I really don't...

**Author's note: **Once again, I'm sorry for the giant delay in updates. Hope you enjoy the next installment.

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A good thirty minutes later Mark and Meredith were fully dressed again and walked out of Mark's office like nothing had happened.

Several heads turned in their direction, a couple of people were obviously whispering about them and a few nurses just stared at them boldly, but it only lasted a few minutes before everyone went back to work.

Having arrived at the nurses station Mark picked up some files, while Meredith waited patiently for Mark to check and sign some charts. When they were about to leave the nurses station, they almost collided with Derek. He was standing in front of them, with a smile on his face that looked too fake to be real. His eyes sparked with anger and his arm was around a small woman with shoulder long brown, slightly curled hair and the tiniest of smiles. The woman seemed incredibly shy and incredibly proud to be standing next to Derek Shepperd.

"Dr Sloan, Dr Grey", Derek said, trying hard to keep the anger out of his voice, but failing miserably.

"Dr Shepperd", they both greeted.

"It's a wonderful day to save lives, isn't it?", Derek asked them, more out of politeness then anything else. It was more than obvious that he was having a huge problem with the fact that Mark and Meredith were together. However, for the sake of his companion he tried real hard to not let it show.

"It's still raining", Mark stated dryly, while Meredith just nodded.

The woman Derek was with giggled softly and batted her eyelashes at Mark, obviously impressed by his appearance. Meredith all of a sudden felt a jolt of jealousy course through her body and took a step forward so she was closer to Mark, clearly indicating she didn't want another woman flirting with her man. Even though the woman in front of her could hardly be seen as competition.

Both Mark and Derek had noticed the change in Meredith and while Mark chuckled at the possesiveness of Meredith, Derek just seemed genuinely pissed off.

After a few more moments of silence, Derek decided to speak up.

"Dr Sloan, Dr Grey, I'd like you to meet Amanda Green. She's a law student at Seattly University".

But doctors extended their hands as they greeted Amanda. Meredith even smiled. She was surprised how easy it was and how great it felt to meet her ex-boyfriends new love interest.

Derek himself was obviously very surprised as well when he realised that the presence of Amanda didn't seem to hurt Meredith as he thought it would. So he decided to up his game a little bit more.

"Meeting Amanda sure was the highlight of my week", Derek stated, putting his arm around Amanda and pulling her close lovingly.

Mark scoffed, clearly realising what Derek was up to and was about to speak up, when Meredith suddenly stopped him by putting her hand on his upperarm. She looked up at him, winking before speaking up.

"That's great, Dr Shepperd!", Meredith stated, surprised with herself about how genuinely honest she had sounded.

"But you know what's even better?", Meredith continued, "…keeping your highlight of the week and relive it about … three times a day".

Mark was pleasantly surprised with her statement and knew exactly what she was hinting on, in the meanwhile feeding the gossipsick nurses with some hot and steamy information. She hated the gossip network, but right now she didn't care that she once again was the subject of many conversations.

Derek had turned the deepest shade of red and it was clear that he too had heard the gossiping nurses talking about Mark and Meredith's super steamy sexlife. He now was wondering wether or not Meredith had told the truth.

Amanda had also turned a deep shade of red and even though it was impossible for her to have heard the gossip, she obviously understood the deeper meaning of Meredith's statement.

Meredith herself was standing next to Mark, a small smile playing on her lips and quite proud with herself for making such a statement. Anyway, she was quite pleased with herself and was surprised when she didn't feel any quilt or resentment towards Derek. Maybe she was finally truly happy.

When the silence got so thick you could cut it with a knife and became pretty much unbearable, Mark cleared his troat and told the other that he and Meredith were already late for a surgery. Meredith, glad that Mark wanted to leave, said her goodbyes to Amanda and while Mark already walked away she turned to Derek.

"Amanda looks like a really nice woman. So you might want to reconsider calling her your highlight of the week. It sounds a little …… cheap".

After having said that Meredith walked in the same direction as Mark had, thinking that maybe today would be the start of a new part of her life.

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**The End!**

AN2:

I've done a lot of brainstorming, mostly about where I wanted to go with this story. Part of me wanted to write a couple of chapters so this chapter didn't have to be the end, but most part me realised that this was a perfect ending to this story, definitely because I've truly neglected all my stories and I seriously need to update all of them. So because of that and because of the fact that my Mark/Meredith muse is not always around when I need her, I decided to end it here.

But do not worry. The way I see it: Mark and Meredith are happy, Derek is trying to move on and by not continuing this story, I'm giving them all some time to be happy. Because I'm seriously thinking of writing a sequel. One where Mark and Meredith will still be together and have a lot of steamyness while Derek is nowhere to be seen… ;) Nah, just kidding. But not about the sequel I'm not!

So, I will write a sequel, but not just yet because I'm focusing on continuing my other stories. So once I finished those, I'll start writing the sequel. That way, I can focus on one incomplete story instead of 3… I might write a few one shots, so if you have any ideas or suggestions, feel free to tell me ;)

Hope you enjoyed this story, please check my other stories and please leave a review.


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